I can barely believe that we are almost halfway through January – January can seem like a long month but it feels like it’s flying by so far and I know that all too soon it will be February and with it Emma’s fifth birthday, which only goes to illustrate just how quickly time passes by. It feels so strange to think she will very soon be five. She has really changed and developed so much in the last few weeks; her sense of fairness and justice is still very much there and she is a determined and strong-willed little thing – she reminds me of myself at times.
When Damian and I first started dating he once told me that he liked that I was passionate about the things I believed in and that I wasn’t afraid to speak out when I felt it needed it. Emma reminds me of this so much and her little voice will sometimes shake with anger or frustration, but she’ll get her point across. She’s determined and strong willed and I love watching that little personality develop.
As the year changes, and the children’s birthdays tick by, it’s a good time to reflect. For me, 2018 was the year I got back to being me. Whilst I relish my job as a mum to the three children, it’s easy to get lost in that part of my identity and become simply Daniel, Emma and Harry’s mum. Last year I started to make an identity for myself away from them again. I threw myself into the gym and realised that having that time away, doing something that challenges me, is essential to keep me sane. I was posting some running stuff on my IG stories last week and I was asked why I enjoy running. The answer? It’s the only time my mind is still. I can only concentrate on putting one foot in front of the other, steadying my breathing and simply deciding how far I want to run that day. My mind isn’t thinking of how I can approach a new subject, the things I need to prepare for the projects the children are working on, or the commitments we have the next day. For those moments I am at the gym or out running I’m just a 30 something woman. I’m not mum, I’m not needed. I am just being in a state of existence.
In 2019 I want to carve out a little bit more of my identity, and I want to learn more things. I want to set myself new targets because doing so keeps me focussed. It’s only little things I want to do, but things that are important.
Making an effort
It’s all a bit too easy sometimes to not make an effort; to throw on a pair of jeans and a jumper and be done with it. I want to make more effort and actually wear some of the nicer clothes in my wardrobe! I put off wearing some of my stuff and now it’s too big!
I also want to wear more of my jewellery. I have so many nice necklaces and they don’t get worn. The children are past the age of pulling at me so it’s safer to wear things now without worrying about damage. I have made a small start by wearing a watch every day. It’s only a little thing but it’s the small changes that have the biggest impacts. I’ve been gifted a beautiful watch by Adexe London and it’s just perfect for me. I have a couple of old watches, but inevitably fashions move on and my older ones are much heavier than I want to wear now and don’t sit as nicely on my wrist. The Adexe watch, however, is very slim and is super easy to adjust (and also come with an easy to change leather strap). I chose the MAC Petite Steel Blue watch and it’s super stylish and I really like it.
I have missed wearing a watch and it makes a change when we’re sat at home to be able to glance at my watch rather than get my phone out to check the time. I like the delicate detail on the watch face and it’s fast become a staple of my morning routine to reach for my watch after getting ready in the morning.
Setting small targets
Target setting really helps me work towards things when I am in the gym. This month I am doing the race at your pace 50 mile challenge and it’s giving me a real push to do different things. I know I need to look after my body so I am taking more time to stretch and work on my flexibility and strength. I set myself small targets that, whilst challenging, are achievable and having these aims helps to keep me focussed on the time I have in the gym. I don’t have endless hours to spend in the gym or out running so knowing what I want to achieve is really helping and having those little targets to push myself towards really help.
I have my running challenge that I want to do for the first quarter of the year, (and possibly longer) and I’m working on a few smaller strength things at the gym; increasing my deadlift weight, managing more press-ups and improving my flexibility and overall strength.
Make time for creativity
I’m keen for the children to really develop their creativity, be that through art, construction or language. Daniel has a real flair for English; it’s a subject he picks up with ease and his understanding of English is impressive (to me at least) and he picks up new ideas with ease. He understands what nouns and adjectives are and is developing his awareness of grammar rules each week. He likes to play with words and is an avid reader. I want to nurture this side of him over the coming year.
Emma is much more artisticly inclined. She will sit and draw and creates any number of pictures, with thought to the shapes she is using to create her picture. She is excited to explore different techniques and materials and I want to help her develop these skills too.
I also want to find more time to do the things I enjoy, drawing with the children and working on my own love of reading; I used to read so many books and so miss that time of escaping into another world and getting drawn into a story.
Trying more meal ideas
As part of my general fitess drive I want to take more time to experiment with different foods, and get a better overall balance to our diet. This month already I have found two new tasty recipies – one a delicious vegetable packed paella and another a vegetarian sausage casserole which was really tasty and one that we will have again soon. I want to get better at eating more fresh veg and have a Mexican taco Salad to try next week as well as some more recipies to work through before I return the recipe book to the library. The children love getting invovled in prepping the food and are always much moe inclined to try it too when they’ve been involved in the making.
What are you hoping to achieve in 2019, are you making any small changes to your everyday routines